Pamela Anderson

Sometimes life needs to imitate art, and sometimes it is the other way around. Is Pamela Anderson really a pornstar who happened to end up in the mainstream, or is she a mainstream celebrity who should’ve been a pornstar? These question can get your balls in a knot, so stop contemplating and start manhandling or clit-twiddling yourself. Whatever Pamela Anderson is, she’s a tried, tested and true infinite source of self-stimulation material. She’s the make and model for how budding porn stars should look, and an example for how we want more mainstream models to act. We know this Baywatch thespian is a true horny fuck machine in real life, because of all the talk about her many sex tapes with various rock stars and pro wrestlers. Doesn’t this prove that the only sex Pamela really likes is wild, heavy-hitting, powerful pussy slam jobs, bad-boy body rocking, depraved sweat-filled fuck-gasms? We sure think it does. You don’t go around with such a gorgeous slut face and those ball-blowing mammoth fun-bags if you don’t do the dance of depravity. Getting nasty on a boat with Mötley Crüe drummer Tommy Lee sure made some heavy waves. The way she gobbles up his drumstick down her oral hole, works it in between her boobs, and finally inserts it deep into her bald and engorged pussy, should have had the Coast Guard warning everyone of the tidal waves of sperm expected to come shooting out of everyone.