To spit or to swallow
Q: My wife performs oral sex on me but she doesn’t swallow. While it is still really great, I wish she would swallow. Any way to get her to do so?
A: Getting a partner to do something she really is not comfortable doing is not easy. It’s also not cool to insist or pressure her to do something she doesn’t want to do. She may have had a bad experience, she may be grossed out by it, or she may not like the taste or consistency. You can always ask her to try and keep it in her mouth and then spit it out but do not pressure her if she’s not into it.
At the end of her rope
Q: My husband has not has sex with me for over a year. All he wants to do is have me masturbate him while he masturbates himself. His penis feels like a limp rope. He says this is normal. Help me as I am at the end of my rope!
A: This is clearly a problem and there is nothing “normal” about denying the presence of erectile dysfunction. He needs to find out why he as ED and address the underlying cause. Please urge him to seek medical advice for this and maybe a trip to the sex therapist for a thorough evaluation would be in order.
A guilty pleasure
Q: How do I stop feeling guilty about loving sex?
A: If you feel guilt there may be underlying reason for that. It’s possible you were raised to believe that sex is dirty or sinful, or that “good girls” don’t love sex (assuming you are a woman). Guilt feelings will certainly get in the way of you enjoying sex. You may want to talk to a sex therapist or counsellor about this to get to the root of the issue.