Happy Valentine’s Day! Whether you buy into the flowers and chocolates or not, there’s a lot to celebrate today. While we obviously believe that sex is pretty much the greatest thing in the world, there’s a lot to be said for the joy and enrichment that love and romance can bring into our lives. And over the years, the experts here at the Sexual Wellness Center have had a lot to say about the subject.
What Even Is Love?
Considering the range of emotions that we go through when we fall for someone—from infatuation to like to lust, and yes, to actual love—the question of what love actually is can be a compelling one. The SWC’s director, Dr. Laurie Betito, sought to answer this question in a post entitled What Is Love? (Insert joke about the Haddaway song here).
Can 36 Questions Make You Fall Even More In Love?
Whether it was through a serious article or a viral blog post, you may have heard about the infamous “36 Questions to Fall in Love.” As neuroscientist Daniel Michaels explains, It all goes back to a study where the researchers attempted to formulate a method for inducing interpersonal closeness. Most people think of it as something to be done with a stranger—but what’s stopping you from trying it with your partner? You might learn something new…and you might become closer than before.
How To Kiss Like Your Relationship Depends On It
Kissing is the ultimate form of romantic affection—yet as our relationships age and grow, what was once a passionate smooch may turn into a perfunctory peck. But it doesn’t need to be this way! A great kiss is one way to bring your relationship back to that butterflies stage of things, even if you’re years into it. There’s more than one way to kiss—and here, certified sex coach Dr. Stacy Friedman breaks them down and explains why kissing is so crucial to a good relationship.
Making Love Last
What do you do when you find love—and you want to keep it going for months, or years, or the rest of your life? As anyone who’s been in a long-term relationship can attest, making a good thing last is one of the hardest things out there…but there are some key steps to achieving enduring love and intimacy that Dr. Laurie has addressed here.
How Important Is Affection?
Spoiler alert: I’m ready to answer this question right here and now. It’s very important. Yes, even if you detest PDAs, it’s still crucial—because affection isn’t just about hugs and kisses. Dr. Laurie breaks it down in this article and offers tips on how to demonstrate your love in a variety of ways—and there’s something for everyone.
Three Questions To Ask When Getting Serious
No, it’s not just “Do you ever want to get married?” or “Do you want to have kids?”—although those are both valuable things to know. If it’s your first Valentine’s Day with your partner and you foresee it getting serious, it’s important to know how your core values match up about certain things. While the three questions that our dating and relationship coach Frank Kermit proposes you discuss with your partner seem unconventional, they’re actually great tools to clock how your relationship can survive the challenges you might face in the future.
Recognizing A Healthy Relationship
It seems like “toxic” is the word of the decade. While it can be easy to spot the blatantly harmful behaviors that define a toxic relationship, it’s not always as simple recognizing when a relationship is stagnant vs. when it’s healthy. If you’re brave enough to face up to the question “Am I happy or am I just comfortable?”, check out this post about recognizing a healthy relationship by Dr. Laurie.
What’s Your Love Language?
Along with the word “toxic,” the term “love language” seems to keep popping up all over the place. If you’ve struggled to understand what they are—or what yours might be—our director Dr. Laurie has laid it all out with concrete examples, making it easy to figure out for yourself.
How Surprising Your Partner Can Lead To Deeper Love—And Better Sex
Sure, you’ve got a great Valentine’s date or gift planned—but it’s likely that it’s expected. And while there’s nothing wrong with that, there’s something to be said for surprising your partner. A surprise date is like a magic key that can bring you back to the time when your relationship was new and you were utterly infatuated with each other. Sure, enjoy your Valentine’s plans—but in a week or two, take a tip from our sexuality expert Michael Castleman and take your partner out for an impromptu date. The results may surprise you!
The Importance Of Passion
As mentioned earlier, keeping the fire in a long-term relationship can be difficult—but it’s definitely not impossible, and all it takes is some effort. In 2016, Dr. Laurie gave an inspiring TEDx talk on how to keep the passion going as a relationship grows and changes. You can find it here.
If At First You Don’t Succeed, Try Try Again
And what if 2022 isn’t your year when it comes to Valentine’s Day? There’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. But if today bummed you out or made you feel compelled to take the steps to find the right partner before February 14 rolls around again, check out this post from dating and relationship coach Frank Kermit.
Happy Valentine’s Day from everyone at the Pornhub Sexual Wellness Center—may it bring you all the love, fun, affection, and hot sex that we think you all deserve ❤️